I was sitting in the second row at Vineyard St. Albans, late Sunday morning.
“I was praying and got a picture of an eagle trying to fly, but one wing was stiff and unused…
And I feel like God is saying you need to use both to fly.”
In that moment, I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach.
It’s been an incredible few months since I arrived in England. I’ve joined the media team, taken oversight over the YWAM Harpenden website (and the construction of our new one), and I’m co-leading the DTS media track.
In short—I’ve been doing what I’m passionate about, what I’m strong and experienced in.
But that morning at church?
I remembered media is not the only thing I love to do.
Growing up, I didn’t think I could sing. In high school, my brother Jordan found that out and lectured me: “Kayla, everyone can sing. Your voice is like an instrument. You just need practice.”
So, in fits and starts, I’ve been a singer and songwriter ever since. Especially when I was on staff in New Zealand and half of my schedule was in the Prayer Room.
But then I became a full-time teacher. Then I moved to Kona.
And it was much easier to just do the things I’m strong in. Write. Draw. Manage websites. Not sing.
But when I was sitting in church, I knew what my “other wing” was. There was no mistaking it. I felt God nudging me to sing again.
So, in October, I got up on a stage for the first time in two and a half years. I played an hour-long “devotional set” with my ukulele and sang about the goodness of God.
(Disclaimer: I was quite freaked out for a full 24 hours beforehand).
But I felt like I was flying.
So—is there something you enjoy doing but don’t necessarily feel “strong” or experienced in?
It might be time to stretch it out again, take a risk.
There is freedom waiting for you,
on the breezes of the sky,
and you ask,
“What if I fall?”
Oh but my darling,
what if you fly?
-Erin Hanson, Poet
