Two weeks ago I was honestly scared of going home to Hawaii. With assignments being picked off one by one and November 25th being in a matter of weeks, Kona started flooding my thoughts.
Nine months in another country is not something you do every day. Neither is returning back to your hometown after such time. However, homecomings are usually looked forward to with great excitement. Not that I wasn’t excited. The thought of seeing my parents not on a computer screen but in person, being with them, thrilled me beyond expectancy!
But… I saw the dark sides as well. That there are hardships to returning to a previous place of belonging, a place that won’t understand where you have been or who you’ve become anymore. And for myself… I worried incessantly about how I could fall straight back in to who I was before I met Jesus more here, in Bethlehem, New Zealand.
Simply, it was all a lack of trust. Unbelief in God’s promise that He would carry me through to the end– and through to the next season. Good thing Jesus interrupts my conversations with Him. I was so busy pouring out my heart to Him(which we should do more often anyway)… and He showed me His truth. The Father has given me “shields of gold” to carry back from the field of victory (2 Samuel 8:7). His love renewed fresh hope in my heart. If not? You wanna know where I’d be without Him today? I would be sitting here on my swivel chair slouched and bored with life in general. Oh, life is so good because of Jesus.
Yes, there will be moments where it will be hard. But so is anything in this life that is worth it. Despite it all? I am so excited to see the sparkling blue of Kailua Bay and the beautiful Hualalai looming over me as comfort on cloudy day. I am so excited to skip around the University of the Nations campus and hug friends I haven’t seen in ten months, if not more.
God is good.
Therefore my hope is in Him.
Thank you, Lord. Thank you.